Dear Mr. Selig,
It has just come to my attention that Mr. Lew Wolff and the Oakland Athletics would like to move the team into the city of San Jose and build a new stadium, but Mr. Larry Baer and the San Francisco Giants are claiming the territorial rights to San Jose, and therefore blocking the move. They have turned to you and Major League Baseball to resolve this dispute.
Oh, wait a second: “If my memory is serving me correctly”, that was actually 39 months ago.
What’s the holdup?
Look, if you don’t want to resolve this seemingly simple matter on your own, that’s totally fine. Just don’t appoint an imaginary “blue-ribbon” committee and after three-plus years, tell everyone that the issue is still “complex”.
You know what? To prove that this “panel” actually exists, just let everybody know who the three people on the committee are so we can start asking them the questions instead of bombarding you (and seriously, what the heck is a “blue-ribbon” committee? It might as well be a “white-ribbon committee” because your answers always seem to be blank and pointless).
This lengthy delay in making a decision has people wondering whether you actually give a flying raspatutti about the A’s. I mean, are you even aware of how hard GM Billy Beane has worked to keep the team afloat with the meager amount of money that he has at his disposal? Do you think that it’s fun to trade away your best players year after year simply because you don’t have the cash to pay them when they become free agents? How about the fact that the only free agents that want to sign with the A’s are washed-up veterans? (Ben Sheets, Bartolo Colon, Nomar Garciaparra, Jason Giambi, and Mike Sweeney, just to name a few) Or perhaps how entertaining it is to put a bunch of minor-leaguers out there on the field every single day?
And we haven’t even talked about that awful garbage dump that is also known also known as the O.Co Coliseum (you know you are desperate when Overstock.com is the only company willing to sponsor your stadium). I mean, seriously. That place looks like it hasn’t been re-modeled since the 1960s. That’s probably true, considering that the men’s bathroom still consists of a few bathtub-like fountains nailed against the wall for us to urinate in. It’s 2012: Get some urinals, for Pete’s sake!
The ballpark itself is really nothing to be proud of. There used to be a nice view of the Oakland hills past the outfield, but that was erased once Mount Davis was built. The sound system needs a ton of improvement, as every single word the PA announcer says echoes loudly around the stadium (How would you like to hear, “Now batting batting, second baseman baseman, number nineteen nineteen, Jemile Jemile Weeks Weeks!” for nine innings?”).
And last but certainly not least, I hope you have noticed the sparse amount of spectators that come to the stadium for games. The only time the place is half-full is when the Yankees or Red Sox come to town, and three-quarters of the fans are rooting for the opposing team.
To be blunt and honest, as long as the A’s play in that garbage dump, a.k.a O.Co Coliseum, they will never attract fans, free agents, and most importantly, wins.
Ok, Bud (no pun intended). The ball is still in your court here. I know you have a tough enough time with all the other issues around the league, and I know that it’s not easy to keep 30 owners and teams happy at the same time. But seriously, 39 months to resolve a seemingly simple case is way too long.
It took just eight months for Louis Freeh and his team to come up with a report on the Jerry Sandusky case, which was one of the most complex cases of all-time. So really, what right do you have to sit in front of the media and, after 39 months, say that say that it is “very complex”?
Listen, all you have to do is waive the Giants’ territorial rights to San Jose, and allow Mr. Wolff and the A’s to move in and build a brand new ballpark – generate more fans, attract more players, and win more games.
Sure, there might be lawsuits against MLB for waiving San Francisco’s territorial rights, but it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that there really is no purpose for the Giants to have those rights. AT&T Park is a beautiful stadium, and the Giants are not moving anywhere anytime soon. Plus, wouldn’t it be better for the A’s to move to San Jose, which is farther from San Francisco than Oakland is? That gives the Giants the opportunity to grab the fanbase in Oakland that was betrayed by their team moving away.
So, please Mr. Selig. Give us a decision, any decision. Get your imaginary white-ribbon committee together and come up with a solution to this matter. And the next time you speak about this subject, I don’t want to hear any more of how “complex” this issue is.